My My isnt it amazing how things go eh?

I've not been contributing to my blog very much since the start of the year. Things have got both worse and better. I have had a couple of really nice days but something today has kicked the shit out of me. One of my Friends who I have been recently started getting closer to still has me blocked on her profile. Yeah I know its a pretty small thing to get upset about. Or is it.
She has lots of Friends on the net. I have about the same amount of Friends on-line as I have in real life. IE not many. Perhaps i am abrasive, perhaps I rub people up the wrong way.

Anyway i had what could only be described as a corrosive encounter with the abyss. I could cross, i couldn't raise my guardian angel as all the bad things that i realised i had done started pulling me down and held me fast to my corporeal body. things like ' oh look at mister wizard he cant even find time to rub his girlfriends sore back, and she loved you and you through it back. all horrible and pretty scary considering it was all the things i had hated myself for. I seem to have come back a nicer person though, perhaps a little conscientious about others feeling. The only problem I'm having is i seem to expect others to have changed the same way. c'est la vie

What a mess you got me into this time

I refer to the Pharma Farms for Reduction. Yes there gonna start trying to decrease some of my medication, medication with side effects on reduction. Hell there cutting ma benzos. Fast as well. But hey it had been commin for a long time but Christmas, the pharmaceticaly minded worst time of the year as scripts depended on by some and not others get fucked up anyway.

I suppose we all go different paths in the end, I mean nothing lasts forever ok, fock it. Im single shit there i said it, I got dumped. I hate her, i love her ya know. I'm kinda lost in a fog but I know which stars to follow(celestial not terrestrial) and i have a keen sense of direction I can point east without thinking most of the time.

The amount of people who have been giving it you'll be alright, is mean what if she was the one. My other personality slaps me in face and says get 'over it' i mean the other side of my personality

They Junk Times are Changin........

Hi folks. Love and light to all
I had a thought today, kinda heavy one. I was reading Junky by Lonesome Cowboy Bill (Bill Burroughs) anyway i was reading the part when he was in Lexington. Dolophine or Methadone was ectremly controlled.
I know my drugs for several reasons but 'kicking the gong around' has been one, so has the 'pure radge trainspotting' expereince has too. Ive seen the needle and the damage done so to speak, Im seeing people at the chemist picking up 200/300ml of methadone daily DAILY. Back then they were lucky enough if the got enough to keep the rattles away, many did better in Bills day quiting on the street cos there was stronger stuff about and you could buy paregoric and Opium but to quote bill 'a white guy couldn't make a wong''clom fliday' he(bill)would always say they would say, invariable they did
300 ml that as strong as 30ml of Oramorph. What are they playing at its not healthy but they're trying to drag the Crime Rates down, if you smoke one joint of 'soap bar and start spilling it yourself, man its brilliant' as i was told.

One thing hated most by Doctors ,weirdly, is addits that can function normaly, the ones who buy a bit of this or every bit of this or that(pharamacutical, with a label ya know) What i would give to be One of the Characters in Drug store Cowboy, god i wouldn't care if I was a junkie if i was shooting Dilauded or Fentenyl or anything opiated.

Heroin addicts are addicted to heroin, why don't they give them HEROIN its a fucking waste of a life sometimes to be put on Methadone, most keep using, why did i need to be one of the preachy ones who said 'never again' They get better drugs from the doctor and they get put up every time they get tested.

Back to the beggining most Counselors are pathetic they know about as much about drugs as a newbie junkie greeting on the street cos he thinks his first rattles are the worst he'll expereince.

It all comes together that the Gov, Health System would if they could kill all the addicts and Meth is one way to go about it read this for example:

“Methadone Is Not Best When It Keeps One Addicted For Decades”

Extract Research Notes;

http://www.drugaddictionrx.info/patient/methadonemedicine.html

By Peter Vanderkloot (Advocate For Peoples Rights)

Extract Para (1) Or Do I Emphasize Methadone The Institution-System Of Chemical Parole That Endevours To Keep 10s Of Thousands Of The Most Vurnable Under The Perverse And Avaricious Bureacracy ? Extract Para (4) The Reality Is Also; The System Through Which Methadone Is Provided Is A Uniquely Oppressive Bureacracy That Greatly Reduces The Benefits Of The Medication And Generates Harm Where None Existed Before,Methadone Is Itself A Tool Of Harm Reduction ,The System That Controls Methadone Is A System Of Harm Production. Para (6) The Most Obvious Harm Caused By The Clinic System Is Due To The Attendance Requirements. The Entire System Is Designed Around Observed Ingestion ,And Continual Monitoring.

They want as many young kids fucked up zombies. And dont get me started about Zimovane

We used to be freinds?

I don think i need to add much text exept check out the Atiictrap on YukTube, Its where i put my vids.

Simply the best song about sex and stuff.......

Love this song....

Wow just when you thought it was safe to by pharms again.....

I have seen the coming of the forth plaque, and it is horrible the mindless zombies and demons running around a la Constantine the film. That film stunk as a side note Constantine had Blond hair, looked like sting and was bi........nothing like Kr's performance

Psychonuats of a certain age will remember Jellie Eggs especially in Scotland. It was a drug that gave shall we say a unique head. You would wake up, not me personally drinking on pharms is a recipe for disaster, but i did get attacked by these kinda Jellied out nutters. You see if you 'fought passed the sleepy mellow feeling without falling asleep' you would get a 'great Dunt' which involved you not knowing what the fuck you where doing for around a night, who you where and extremely out of it and dangerous, They didn't take them off the streets ever , they took the inject able ones filmed with a goo that would re-solidify in the shooters veins. You know that line in 'The needle and the damage done' 'Milk blood to keep from running out' is a reference to backpulling or fluching where the herion mixed blood in the syringe is drawn back into the barrel and re injected, sounds stupid until you realise that every push and pull brings a little rush back to you, Well doing that with jellies is Russian roulette the drug problem caused vein problems which killed halve the junkie population of Glasgow. And now kids a drug similar has returned. Zimovane isn't inject able, YET. They'll find a way but it has been found in bags of heroin as a cutting agent. This is a drug that MAKES your completely out of control. You Americans know it as Ambien. You know that lost out in space driving to work at 3 am in your bunnny suit like Rush Limbuagh feeling, no, well you dont want to.

As to the power of Zimovane some have gone shoplifting thinking there invisible.
I laugh at these fools, only Tamazepam makes you invisible.

Austin Osman Spare - The Satyre Of Sigils

Found some lovely quotes by Spare

"The means used and the way it happens are simple, the inverse of scientific. I use a traditional formula, created by instinctive guess and *arbitrarily* formed, not evolved by hypothesis and experiment. The law of sorcery is its own law, using sympathetic symbols."

...

"Science, like Logic and Psychology, is its own bogey and as neurotic as its own creed; its fear of deviation from its arbitrary standards and categories confirms all the definitions of the psychopathic... Science also has to await its rare artist -- to make an audacious guess for enlightenment or mutation. For me, the inexplicable of beauty, the undivulged of things gives them their enchantment, not their known meaning."

...

"I have never yet witnessed any occult phenomena where money was involved whether for expenses or anything else (I preclude the odd symbolic silver coin)."

...

"Finally, scientists will never solve or prove anything related to foretelling the future; it is a work for 'artists'. Science may subsequently prove more fully what the artists have already discovered."

|I hope they are as fascinating to you as me.

PLeasee visit

[ C h a o s M a t r i x ]